The School of Life  

Sorry I have been away for a while, I have been busy deciding what to do about my Sons education. He was born later so he is unable to go to go to preschool this year, however I feel he is ready. 

So I decided to do some research and realized I had two options.

1. Do nothing and wait another year

2. Begin homeschooling him.

I decided option two was a better choice and so did my husband. We are also considering doing this throught elementary school as well, because I had many negative experiences while in the public school system. Most of my recesses were taken away, because I asked too many questions, and did not pay attention. I clearly remember looking out the window when I was in first grade, trying not to cry because I wanted to be playing outside, or wanted to be with my Mom. 

I don’t want my son to grow through the same thing, and have traditional learning kill his curiosity, or his creativity, as well as a strong desire to learn. It is the children that really want to learn that get left behind in the end.

As I have been a stay at home Mom, thanks to my Hardworking husband, my Son has taught me many things.

1. Children are naturally curious and ask many questions, because they want to learn about the world around them. It is in this way, by answering the questions they ask and showing them how to interact with the world around them, they learn about life.

2. When you fail, keep on going. My Son keeps trying, even if he fails. Children are extremely motivated. Somewhere along the path we lose that motivation. I can remeber when I lost my motivation, when I was in first grade. Sitting inside for my recess wishing I was outside, playing in leaves and counting them, instead of counting stupid yellow blocks. 

3. The most important things I learned were from my parents, not teachers. Until you have a child, you never relize how much your parents did for you. I remember my parents reading to me. I remember when my Dad read The Hobbit to me, as I sat in his recliner with him and fell asleep. It is still one of my favorite books, and my sons too! I love reading to him and talking about books. The gift my parents gave me was the ability to read, and that got me through all the recesses I got taken away from me in elementary school, and then the many detentions I had in Jr. High and High school. I could never repay my parents for all the times they took the time to read to me and instill a love of reading and then later naturally I begin to want to create stories of my own. It is in writing I found my passion and voice.

I have learned other things from my Son, and parents. It is because of this I want to take a different approach to learning, and allow my son to pursue the things that he loves at an early age, as well as trust my son to learn, and trust myself as a parent to teach.

So to give you an Idea, these are the things we have been doing…

Buckshot Playing at the Street Fair

Cookie counting game

Frosty the Snowman (The oreos were for another activity my son loved, I will post the link later.)

Learning about Watersheds (And the impact we have on our environment.)

A beautiful sunset to end our busy day!

Learning should not be done in a room, the real learning is to be done by living life outside, not inside a classroom with four walls, and a broken system school system that leaves children behind. 

The real world is waiting. Go ahead and let your children live, be happy, learn, and love…

…But the most importaint thing is just to let kids be kids, in a world that is cruel, we could use some wild spirited free thinkers.

Look for updates the next two days… this post will be updated with links for parents interested in homeschooling preschoolers!

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Things I think about…

Sometimes I get ideas for my books from life and current events. I want to write about the uncomfortable things that no one talks about, but things that they themselves experience or are witnesses to. My goal in writing the book I am currently working on, is to encourage people to have the difficult conversations that we choose not to have. 

Conversations I have going on inside my brain at night:

Where is the world headed? How did we get to the point we are at? What happens when a tyrannical corporation rules the planet?

Talking about our feelings, are we sad, hurt or angry and why?

Thr person that suffers from depression. What causes them to feel hopeless?

The alcoholic that became sober. What caused them to drink, and how did they overcome their addiction?

The girl down the street that had an abortion. Why did she do it? And was she ok with that decision? How did that experience have an impact on her life?

What kind of man beats on a woman? Why do they choose to stay or leave?

Circumcision. Why do we still practice it in the U.S? Isn’t it Genital mutilation regardless of the sex of the child? What about the child’s rights? Why cut off the most sensitive part of the body? Could this be why sex crimes and violence are so prevalent in society? 

Breast-feeding. Why do people sexualize breasts? Aren’t they meant for feeding babies? 

The guy that climbed the Trump Tower today, why in the world did he want a personal meeting with him? What was he thinking? Is he a psychopath or autistic? If any of you saw that video, he seemed devoid of emotion when he was talking. Just odd.

The Clinton Foundation. Why do they accept money from foreign government? You think this would be a conflict of interest. How far down the rabbit hole does this go?

To be alive. What does that mean? 

What is my purpose? 

Why can’t I sleep?

Perhaps because I ask to may questions and stay up all night thinking what if? 

And there you have it. That is how an idea, a book, a story is born. Out of the difficult questions we ask ourselves, because everyone else is too polite to ask them.

SilentWomen – Kindle Cover by violin_girl_2006

https://www.canva.com/design/DAB7ZE7Jb_Q/gPZ-8mq-WN72xThVDEhNow/view?utm_content=DAB7ZE7Jb_Q&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=facebook&utm_source=sharebutton

Note: This is not the final copy of my cover. There are some mistakes I have to correct, but this is just an example of the direction I would like to go. I will update this as soon as I make the necessary corrections. 

CreateSpace offers a cover creator for free, but the free covers, and pictures you can use are all generic and I felt left alot to be desired. I really was not happy with any of the free covers that I created and I really do not want to pay oodles of money for someone to design my cover.

I just recently found a service you can use Canva.com, and I think this is a great option. You can create your own covers for a small price. To use them, you must purchase a license.

 One time use, is one dollar. I do not suggest this, because if more than one copy is sold, you must purchase the right to use it again! 

Multiple use, is ten dollars. That gives you the right to use your designs in marketing materials, as well as 250,000 copies. I think this by far is the better option.

I think a good cover design is a must for any writer However they say never judge a book buy it’s cover. Unfortunately most of us do.

Writing Requires Research

Now that I am in the think of my story, I am finding I am having to do research. I think all fiction requires some research to be authentic, especially when you need better understanding of a topic you are writing about.

If you could see my browser history, you might have some questions. Then again, you might have some questions if you see what books I am reading! I will not give away what I’m researching because that will give away my book. 

All I can say is it has been a wild ride writing it so far because it is a psychological thriller, and there are so many different directions I could take this book. Even I think I will be shocked when I finally finish it!

Buisness Card Reviews

Coming Soon… 

A review of my new business cards.

I just got a sample pack a couple of days ago from moo.com. I liked the quality of the card stock so much, that I decided to order some.

I decided to get the mini buisness cards, because I do get people that ask me about my blog when I’m out and about, at family functions, or hanging out with friends. It would be great to have something tangible, like a buisness Card, because chances are they will not remember my site address when they get home. 

Do any of you use business cards, and what company do you have print them for you if you do? 

Babies Need Milkies

My son recently went to the Medina County Fair, as we do every year. He is only two, (three at the end of this month.) But he loves animals, and he wants a pony.

Daddy Get you, he says pointing to the pony. Daddy get you Mommy horse too, because babies need milkies.

My husband and I laughed. He gets it. That babies need there Mommies. The things that come out of his mouth.

But then again he was breastfed, and understands that yes, ALL babies need Milkies!

Unfortunately we did not buy the pony or the Mommy horse. 

Roadblock

I have had writers block for a few days. Every now and then I hit a road block, but I know that sometimes being an observer of people and the events that happen around me, has always been a great strength for me as a writer.

To create anything, I believe you must be good at observing the small things that people do not always see. The artist must paint a picture, but someone or something must inspire them to do it. The painter must paint something that they find beauty in. A photographer, must see something ordinary and turn it into something extraordinary. A journalist must capture the truth no one sees, and a writer must make an observation, and draw a picture with words to evoke emotion. There are other forms of Art as well. When you are creating something, there are no limits.

So my advice to you is when you hit a roadblock, take a few days to just observe life and create something extraordinary out of something that is ordinary.

Life and Death: Coverversations We Need to Have With Toddlers

It isn’t always easy to understand what death is for a toddler. I know my Son understands it now, and my heart breaks for him, because I understand what he is going through. I went through the same thing when I was about his age.

The first time a beloved animal died, I really did not understand what death was. I remember my parents brought our beloved Dog Mercedes, home in a Garbage bag to bury in our pet cemetery. My parents tried to explain that she was gone and had gone to be with Jesus, (I went to church so I understand who Jesus was) but I did not not understand that physically she would be gone forever. She looked peacefully like she was sleeping.

A while later my Aunt Louise died. Her funeral was the first funeral I remember attending. She looked like she was sleeping, but it was then that something clicked. She wasn’t getting up to kiss me, or take me out for ice cream like she promised me, the last time I saw her. It was then I realized she was gone and was sleeping forever. I remember being sad, and missing her. I wished we could go get ice cream one more time, but I realized it was not happening. She was gone.

My son lost a cat that he absolutely adored when he was about a year old. Grey boy, my Son called him grey-go. Grey-Go had cancer, and he knew he was sick and cried and said Grey go sad. When he passed, I told him he went to be with Jesus and is sleeping forever. I don’t think he understood until a couple of weeks later. For two or three weeks he looked everywhere for Grey. “Where are you?” He would say. When he was about two he told me he was he was sad because Grey-Go went to be with Jesus and he is sleeping forever.

A year later, I know he understands. Sitting at my Grandmother’s memorial service, he is holding onto the bulletin for dear life. It has a picture of his Great Grandma on it. He says it’s great Grammy. He cuddles up to me and sees everyone is sad. He knows. He is a wild boy the next couple days, I then realized it is because he is dealing with a lot. 

The day after, he cuddles up to me in the morning and tells me he sees Great-Grandma in the doorway, and on the ceiling and carries her picture around with him everywhere close to his heart. I’m almost certain at this point it is a way that he is trying to deal with his grief, he doesn’t want her to be gone.

 He talkes about how he misses her and about his third birthday coming up, and how he wants Great Grandma at his party. Later, as he is taking his bath, he gets this sad look on his face and tells me he is sad. I ask him why? He says, Grandma went to be with Grey-Go and Jesus. She not sick anymore. 

Then I recalled the moment that I remembered understanding I would never see my Aunt Louise again and how difficult it was for me to rationalize that. 

We cuddled after bathtime. I held my Son and told him it was ok to be sad. He said Mommy sad too, and I said Yes baby, I am, and it’s ok to be sad. Through tears, we looked at pictures of My Son and his Great Grandmother, and talked about the times we shared together as a family. That is what has always gotten me through. The happy memories that we have shared together as a family. I hope that it also helps my Son too, to be thankful that he got to spend that precious time with her.

 I kissed my Son and Thanked God that he at least got the opportunity to spend some time with his Great Grandmother, no matter how short that was, and remembered how difficult it was for me the first time I finally understood what death was. I remembered what it was like to experience it from the perspective of a toddler.

What does it mean to be alive? Is a question we need to ask ourselves and our toddlers, and a conversation we need to have with them, that way when we have to explain what death is, and what it means, they can understand. More important, is the ability to understand it is ok to be sad, it’s ok to miss someone, and to be sad because you will not be able to make new memories with them.